I haven't really posted anything in a while... Not sure why, because the spending has been under control. Well, except for my birthday money; my mother was very insistent that I spend it on something, not just bills.

So, I've used most of it to re-do F's room. We got her new sheets, a new duvet cover. She'll take our old duvet which is too small for our bed, and we got a new duvet. So I guess I mostly spent the money on bedding! Well worth it!

I had two appts. at the Rheumatologist (all the way in ABQ, so there's the gas money, too), but that was well worth it, too! He put my mind at ease about my high ANA result (ANA is for lupus and related diseases). I have a predisposition (not for lupus but for autoimmune stuff), but he (and my regular dr.) both said I'm the healthiest person they know, and the followup bloodwork was good.

We spent a lot on food this month for some reason. It's also a 5 weekend month, which means and extra shopping trip, so I'm going to eat out of the pantry as much as possible.

And... my nephew arrives next Friday! So next month may also be a high food bill month with four of us instead of three. He's staying until Dec. 6th, and I'm so excited. My mother asked what I was thinking about his stay. She wanted to know if I wanted him to live here, but he can't; there isn't an immigration option for nephews. And anyway, he'd miss his crazy family, I think! What I'd like: for him to come away thinking "My aunt and uncle and cousin love me! I love them! I want to make sure we stay in touch and see each other forever." I want him to be there for F, and for F to be there for him.

PS - he arrives just before the election, which he is fascinated with.

The budget says we have money in Entertainment. Summer here is full of free events, so it built up. Which allows us to do some things in the Autumn.

We still have to make choices, though. Our local... um... immersive arts attraction? called Meow Wolf is having House of Halloween. We decided to go tonight! So excited! Another family is going with us. And another of F's friends, too. I made a big pot of chili so we can eat something before we go (it's from 6 to 9).

We decided not to go down to Balloon Fiesta, so that was one of the choices. It would have been fun, but F is not a fan of fire, and those balloons are full of fire! Instead we went to a friend's art opening. He is an amazing artist. Here's his website: http://www.joelnakamura.com/gallery/. I have a birthday card he made for me several years ago, and I framed it!

We still have $166 in Entertainment.

Other stuff coming up in the Autumn: my nephew is coming to visit, and I think we'll visit some National and State parks. Probably also take him to Meow Wolf. And maybe some museums (they are free to residents on Sundays, so we'd just have to pay for him).

What we are not going to do: Nutcracker, Circus Luminous. Those are things we've done in the past, but we don't need to do them every year. Plus - super expensive!

And then... the Trash to Fashion show... maybe this is the year I'll enter something. I saved up a bunch of sweet wrappers. And I wanted to knit a cardigan or shrug out of caution tape. Or maybe something else... Need to start thinking about this...

The night that F went to bed in just a t-shirt... that was when I realized she was completely out of pajama bottoms. And three sleepovers this month! And some time this winter there will be pajama day at school. I sort of dread pajama day because the kids all have matchy-matchy pajama sets; in our family we wear pajama bottoms with a t-shirt.

So... off to Target, and F picked out a new pair of bottoms and then a more winter-appropriate set (top and bottoms! together! that match!). We also visited the athletic section so that she could get a top to wear under her jerseys at fall and winter soccer practice. We spent a lot, but I don't need new clothes any time soon, so it's ok.

Also bought claritin.

I had a $10 off coupon! So that was good.

And the pajamas... raccoons eating pizza and donuts on the set, hedgehogs on the other bottoms. I am a sucker for ridiculous pajama patterns, and apparently so is F. (She will probably want to borrow my polar bears skiing pajamas... no way!).

Last weekend was a whirwind and the rest of this month promises to be as well...

So last Friday and Saturday all day I was in a recertification for the exercise class I teach (Bodypump). I was so tired, so spent! It was like doing 3 classes in a row each day. And when it was all over... I got a cold! I think I was just too exhausted. I spent the day in bed today. I am the kind of person who can't handle not doing something so it was hard.

This weekend... F has a sleepover birthday. She's one of just a few kids invited - it's her best friend's b-day. And a soccer game on Saturday.

The following weekend - hope it's low-key! We are going over to the house of someone I know (but we're not close friends) so I can help her with her deck. Also she runs a non-profit in town and I want D to get to know her since he wouldn't mind doing work for them again. She's a really nice person, so I'm happy to help her, but it's good for D, too. And F is good with little kids, so she can entertain their son.

Then - my closest friend is getting married! We found the ballet flats for F. She's a 6 1/2 (same size as me!!!).

Next weekend - another sleepover, another soccer game! Yikes!

I have to buy some birthday presents, but I have over $100 in the "gifts for others" category.

Other exciting news:
- Mortgage is down to $25,849.56. Below 26k! But it still doesn't feel exciting for some reason. When will it feel exciting?

Very mellow Labor Day... I did the shopping but other than that, we've all just stayed in. F is exhausted from her soccer tournament and her allergies are acting up.

I went to the store and spent almost exactly $100 for the week. I did buy some things that were two-for-one at Sprouts which will be eaten in future weeks (soup, rice). So that's a pretty successful weekly shop. I also got gas for the week (even when my car isn't empty I fill up after I do the grocery shopping on the weekend because I don't have time during the week to fill up - it takes a lot of stress off of my week!).

I also bought toilet paper at Target (got a $5 gift card with my two packages). And clothing for F in the next size up: two pairs of long leggings (it's already getting cool), long sleeved tshirt, cami and a fall jacket. The hand-me-downs for this age are pretty rare because they seem to wear things until they are threadbare. Also F is tall, but really thin, and the girl that she used to get things from is not the same shape. Actually the only girls her shape/size are on her soccer team... maybe I should make friends with the moms on a slightly older team?

Meanwhile, I have some old soccer shorts to hand down. I do know a lot of those moms, so I need to think about which of those girls has like a 10" waist and can fit in those ridiculously small shorts.

Here is the menu plan for the (short) week:
​
M - frittata and toast (I know; this isn't really Labor Day food)
T - fish, broccoli, rice and sauce
W - pollo pibil and black beans and salad
T - pasta carbonara and peas
F - Soccer Team party - baked potato bar - each family is bring some toppings or a dessert or fruit
S - tostadas

And for F's lunches (you know I do this on a spreadsheet, right?):
- chicken strips (from Trader Joe's, I make in the morning and put in the thermos to stay hot), salad with ranch, melon, veggie chips, caramel/cashew cluster from the bulk bins - this is in lieu of the school's overly-expensive hot lunch
- turkey wrap, cucumber and dip, peach, chips and salsa, cookie
- burrito, carrots and dip, watermelon, rice crackers, cookie
- slice of pizza from the freezer (leftover), snap peas, grapes, rice crackers, cookie

Her snack is usually some trail mix or cheese and crackers or some pineapple chunks.

Do you have a plan for your child's lunch?

Today is Day 2 of the soccer tournament. I've already packed a lunch for me and F; D is in charge of his own (although I did a big tupperware full of watermelon for all of us, and there's a piece of cornbread I made last night waiting for him to take).

One thing I can say for soccer tournaments: it is a frugal day out! Except for the hour-long heart attack I have while F is playing her games, it is super fun as well. The families on her team are all friends. We love hanging out with each other, and it's a good time to catch up.

We need to leave at 9:15, so I have a couple of minutes to vacuum the den and bedroom and to dust before I take a shower. That just leaves a little bit of housework for this evening.

What I really wanted to talk about was my "need to buy" list. Do you have a list like that? There aren't a lot of things on it, but as we move into winter, I can see how I need to budget a little bit for some planned expenses:
- new tires for my car (I think I need two)
- snow boots for F (she grew out of the old ones)
- waterproof pants for F (same problem)
- faux ugg boots (bear paw boots) for F (still the same problem)
- new brush for F (she used her friend's brush on the school overnight and loved it, and said she could brush her own hair, so that's a plus)
- maybe a new kettle but that could definitely wait - it's fussy - doesn't always heat up and you have to jiggle it a little bit

My mother called last night to say she bought a new car yesterday. Hers was almost 10 years old and had 60k miles; that's what my car has and it's completely fine! Anyway, a car is not on my "need to buy" list and hopefully won't be for a long time!!

Lots of updates to report!

- D's dad - the social workers (or whatever they are called in the UK) finally determined that D's dad couldn't stay in D's sister's house. Finally! He is in nursing care now, and they will determine if he can be out on his own again (he can't). D hasn't talked to his dad in weeks because his sister was out of town, and the phone doesn't work in the room his dad was staying in. There was a woman who lives in a van on their property who was popping in to feed D's dad while they were away; I am amazed that this was an acceptable arrangement. No one there with him, and he didn't have the ability to make calls. In the move to the care facility, somehow D's sister lost the ipad charger D got for his dad, so he doesn't have an ipad either.

- Our nephew - We are still trying to make arrangements with D's sister for our nephew to come stay for a few months. Everyone is excited about this, but as you can tell, D's sister isn't that great at making plans. New tactic: we look for possible tickets, and if they ok an itinerary, we make the arrangements. D's mum is going to pay for the tickets.

- F's anxiety - So, so much better. She just did an overnight with school and had a GREAT time! The teacher texted me yesterday afternoon to say F was doing well, which was so nice of her.

- Soccer Tournament - F's team is playing in a tournament this weekend (2 games Saturday, 2 Sunday). This is always difficult because I usually clean house on the weekends, and do the shopping. Also - we don't want to succumb to eating out just for convenience - too expensive!! D stopped by the store to pick up some sliced turkey for sandwiches. We have chips and crisps and fruit and string cheese and cookies. We'll be fine this weekend.

- Meal Plan - the tournament messes with the meal planning a little bit, too. Tonight is pasta and red sauce with oven-roasted brussels sprouts. Tomorrow - ???. Maybe a freezer meal? And then I can plan next week. I'm assuming I can shop on labor day.

I haven't posted in a while...

1. Had a sort of minor health issue - the whites of my eyes turned completely red! Yuck! I won't get into how I ended up at the dr. and blood tests, etc... but it's an auto-immune problem. The red is gone, but this is the 4th time this has happened in 6 months. The red is gone, so that's good. I need an appt. with a rheumatologist and apparently that will take a miracle according to my doctor. This is a small city with only a few doctors of each type. I may have to go to Albuquerque. One of the drs. used to go to the gym with me; maybe he'll remember my name and fit me in? Anyway, spent about $70 on dr. visits and eye drops so far.

2. Yesterday was the annual 5th/6th grade hike. Parents are welcome. We went 9.75 miles round trip up to the top of the mountain and back. Super fun! I got to talk to lots of kids, including many 5th graders I didn't know. One girl is new in my daughter's class; my daughter thinks she's awesome and she was instant friends with my daughter and her other three friends when they met at the before-school-started party I organized at the park.

I walked with the girl for a while and asked how she likes it here (she also moved from another state) and she said it's incredible... she loves the state, loves her new friends, loves the school. She said the other two times she moved schools it took like a month before she even had anyone to eat lunch with and this time she had four friends to each lunch with the very first day and every day since!

On the hike, she smelled a ponderosa pine for the first time - have you ever smelled in the cracks in the bark of a ponderosa? It smells like butterscotch! Or vanilla, or caramel. If you have any ponderosas near you (or if you come to the Rocky Mountains), you have to sniff the trees!!!

3. I am taking a break between cleaning the house... my new method is do two cleaning things (clean birdcage, vacuum den or whatever) and then relax for a few minutes. I have mentioned before that I don't have a house cleaner. This frees up a lot of money to do things that are more meaningful to me.

4. Did the menu plan for the week already. Will post it later. I am usually really good about diet (lots of vegetables, no red meat, no pork, not a lot of fat), and I am trying to eat even more veggies. I always have to take into account soccer nights when we don't get to eat until 7:45 or 8 (so the food needs to be done when we get home).

5. Besides working, I have a long term project going on at the office... I am building another dollhouse. Right now it doesn't look like much. I work on it maybe 1/2 hour a day, so it might take a while.

6. Got a check for $18.56 for jury duty, and I put it toward the mortgage. I need to update the mortgage balance on my sidebar. We now owe $28,888.33. Below $30k! Next milestone is $20k... that will really feel weird (and great).

7. That's it - need to go clean the birdcage now!

F and I went to Albuquerque today to get her a dress for our good friend's wedding.

We found the perfect dress at H&M - bright green, not lacy, not revealing, just a cute sleeveless dress with a flared skirt. $10!!

We also got a long sweater at the Gap - wedding is October 15, and that is definitely a transition season here. It could be warm still but cold at night. It usually snows in late October/early November.

We had lunch out, too, and it was fun hanging out. We played music in the car and sang.

I am not good at malls, however. Or shopping in general. F is like me. We bailed early.

And we did not find ballet flats. Ugh. I am thinking maybe Target? I hesitate asking her friends' parents where they get theirs, because I fear it may be $100 flats from J Crew.

In other news, apparently one of F's best friends is "ready to move on to 7th" and has been since last year, according to her mother. She is reading Sylvia Plath (!!!) and Shakespeare and is ready for more. I had to carefully compose an email back (couldn't just ignore her) where I said something like "oh, aren't they all so different" and that I think F will really benefit from being the oldest grade in the school for a year before she goes to the "big school." What I didn't say: Their school, by the way, is academically excellent. And there are so many new responsibilities and privileges in 6th. Not sure that academics is the only measure of moving on. And not sure that this girl (or any girl that age) should be reading Sylvia Plath.

Sigh.

I hope I'm not a pushy parent.

I'm in the bedroom with my laptop, and F is in the living room playing Life with her friend G. I am the mom that other moms can always ask to take their daughters home from soccer camp (or practice or school or whatever). This is great, and I love being that mom, but it means always having the house stocked with watermelon and popsicles and string cheese.

It's hard to keep the grocery bills down!

But I am trying.

The meal plan for next week:
fishy - pad thai noodles
potatoey/eggy - crash potatoes and veggies
chickeny - make a whole chicken with veg and rice
cheesy/bready - frito pies
something from the freezer with salad
pasta - with goat cheese and courgettes

Bonus: the pad thai can be eaten as leftovers, chicken always results in leftovers that can be made into croquettes or whatever, I already have beans in the freezer for frito pies. Three vegetarian meals, one fish meal, two chicken/turkey meals - that is right in my preferred ratio!

Today's pet peeve is: I am on the Building and Grounds Committee at F's school (that's not the pet peeve) and the Chair wants to meet on Monday, two days before school starts. Um - I don't have childcare two days before school starts, and if we meet before school starts, then I have to bring my daughter. This guy has a daughter the same age, in my daughter's class, but I'm assuming he is counting on his wife to watch their daughter, so he doesn't need to bring her to a meeting. I told him I couldn't do it until the day school starts, so hopefully that works, but I can't help think that there is a little bit of insensitivity about women who work full-time and are responsible for family life.

I am now going to rant a little bit about my dumb gym, so you can skip this bit if you want.

Rant!! When I got to class (the class I take, not the class I teach) today I had not been paid for May, June or July. Grrr!

Rant again!!! I walked in the door and the owner thought I was the teacher for that class. He said "Here's L!" And then he backpedaled and said "Oh, no - wait - M is teaching today!" Huh? I said "I am?" and he said "Yeah, didn't you get L's text?" Um, no. But I keep all of my music and choreo in the car, so I taught.

Rant Rant Rant!!! While I was doing abs (almost done with the class, but not done) he comes over, distracts me and starts handing me some cash for July he said. I told him (between heel digs) that I hadn't been paid for May or June either. He said I wasn't there in June. I left on vacation June 26th, so what was he talking about? I missed two classes (I teach two a week) and taught 7.

Rant Rant Again!!! He paid me some weird low-ball amount, which I will use to pay down the mortgage.

And more: He said I'm now supposed to teach three classes and one of them is 8:45 am which I told him I can't do until school starts. I hope we ironed that out, but I think we probably didn't.

YOU CAN START READING AGAIN....

1. I am going to quit this gym.
2. I already contacted another gym that has the license for the class I teach, and they have spinning, too, and I'm certified to teach that for life.
3. I need to recertify for the weightlifting class, and it's $290, but this other gym pays $25 per class, so I'll have that paid back in three months or less.

So there you go. Big changes, I guess. And even though I so don't want to recertify, and I think it's stupid (the main reason I need to recertify is that I wasn't teaching in a licensed gym which is because my gym let the license lapse). I've been certified to teach this class since 2002.

I know that ultimately this will mean more money and I'll be happier with a well-run gym.

Now I just need to concentrate on getting architecture work - need a new project for 2017 (made all the money I need to for 2016). This feels like a turning point in getting control back.

So much going on here right now! We're trying to eke out a little more summer before school starts.

Circus Camp - F had her circus camp performance on Friday night. She did trapeze (photo below!) and unicycling and stilt-walking. I bought her a new t-shirt because her old one from camp is too small ($15).

Lots of Unicycling in the Park - We went to the park a lot to practice unicycling. I even tried it, and couldn't even get on the saddle! Grrr!

Soccer in the Park - tonight, meeting friends. And we're bringing the unicycle of course.

My friend's wedding - in mid-October! I'm so excited for her! And F is the flower girl, which means we need to get her a dress and some ballet flats. Yes, my daughter only owns soccer cleats, sneakers, indoor soccer cleats and a pair of outdoor/merrell type sandals. And she has exactly one dress that is a cotton thing she wears after the pool. Where we live dress-wearing doesn't come up that often. All of this means a trip to Albuquerque. They have a Macy's, a Gap, Old Navy. Any other ideas for a dress for a girl that isn't just a dress-wearer?

D's Job - D is getting worried that the non-profit he is working for is shrinking a bit. I think his job is safe, but he's looking around anyway. This is not a big city, and the jobs in his field aren't plentiful, and he's sort of freaking out. So I had to go through this exercise with him where I calc'd only our necessary expenses, and it turns out if we stopped saving and bought only essentials we could live on my salary. Assuming this would only be for a few months, it wouldn't be that bad. So I think he isn't worrying as much. When we pay off our mortgage things will be even less tight.

My nephew - D is on the phone with our brother-in-law right now making arrangements! My fingers are crossed, and I will let you know when things are worked out.

Clean House - Every weekend I clean the house, but I'm DONE so we can go to the pool!

Mortgage - We are officially in the 20k's!!!! $29,296.94. I would say this deserves a celebration, and I'd planned to treat ourselves every time we went went down $10k, but I am so focused on paying this off that I just want to save the money for that and not go out for a big dinner or something.

New lunchbox - Got F a new lunch box yesterday. She'd had her old one 3 years and I was having a hard time getting it to stop smelling! Yuck! I washed it every night! Anyway, it was tax-free day here which meant it was 8% less than usual, and I used my Target card, so another 5% off. So the total was $10. She's very excited about it since it's cute but not girly, a teen/tween lunch box/bag: http://www.target.com/p/thermos-lunch-bag-rainbow/-/A-49146390

And now it's time to go buy groceries and then go to the pool! Hope you're all enjoying the rest of summer!

This is a different to-do list. I have a day-to-day to-do list and I'm very good on getting things done.

This is my general, overall, life to-do list:
- find a new project for 2017 (I have a lot of projects that are wrapping up/in construction - need a new one!)
- figure out what to do about the gym situation (the gym attendance is so low now that they moved us to the south part of town - we lost most of our old attendees, then the gym owner put us in a room with no AC and no windows, so no doubt we'll lose more). I need to leave and find a new gym.
- 50th birthday party - no idea what I want to do, but I want to invite everyone (this may mean 100 people coming)! So it'll need to be large and inexpensive. Will be in October so outside won't work. I'm not so much into just sitting around. Not sure where to have it, or what to do. My birthday is on Halloween - but the party won't be on Halloween. Costumes? (I'd be into that, but will everyone else?). 80s music? (yes!) Kids should be able to come, too!!!

Here is what I wanted to buy today but didn't (and I am very proud of myself):

- Walking downtown, our friends wanted to stop for gelato; we got F a cup with cash, but D and I didn't get any.

- Got an email from UKonserve (the containers we use for lunches) for a buy one get one thermos container. It would be a $20 savings, but also a $20 spend (plus shipping). We already have a thermos for F's lunch, and I have a microwave at work, so I don't really need it.

- Saw a red top on the Banana Republic website; it's a color I love that doesn't come out that often, but it's part linen (not sure what that means for care) and it was $37. No thanks. I have enough t-shirts. I bookmarked it in case it goes on sale, and I'll check in every once in a while unless I forget about it (which is entirely possible). First I'll see if it's dry clean, because in that case - no way!

Paid off some money to mortgage principal yesterday, and I am happy to report that despite the new banking system, it showed up in online banking this morning. We now owe $31,006.56. Which is so frustrating! I mean, that $6.57 shouldn't matter, but I would love to see a number in the 30k's.

It's ok... as soon as F is in camp next week, I am posting some things on craigslist or facebook and I am confident this will be below the 31k's by the end of the month.

In other (boring!) news:
- Jury duty is tomorrow; I am reviewing what I can/can't take with me and what I'm supposed to wear (no tank tops).
- We took the cat to the vet for his annual check up today; $84. I guess it's ok since it's budgeted for

My bank has updated their entire website... and ugh! It's just terrible! Actually it's not just the website and online banking, but also the banking system in the physical bank itself.

There were a bunch of generic, suit-wearing people milling around the bank to see how the transition was going this morning. People here don't really wear suits and none of these people looked like New Mexico natives, so I'm pretty sure they were from out of town, probably representing the system that the bank bought.

This is a small local bank, and everyone here loves it. I don't love it as much as I did yesterday.

I made two deposits, got my receipt and realized that the receipt no longer has the last few digits of the account number on it. So I had to scribble on each which account they belonged to. Ugh.

And I also paid down some mortgage principal. Instead of the normal sheet that shows that it was a principal payment and the amount of the loan before and after the payment, I got a generic receipt that looked like my deposit receipts. There was no account listed. It said "special payment" which they told me meant it was principal payment, sort of. It didn't list the previous amount of the mortgage or the new amount, so I couldn't tell that it was a principal payment. The teller was super-sorry; I kept telling her it wasn't her fault.

I sought out one of the generic suit-guys to ask if he wanted some feedback, and he said yes, definitely. He told me that my principal payment would show up tomorrow in online banking if I wanted to check it (but at the moment it looks like I took money out of checking and it evaporated).

I also let him know that in the new online system, my escrow account (for taxes and insurance) has disappeared. He said that he thought that would be with the mortgage, and I told him that it wasn't; I'd checked that morning. He said "Oh, huh, well that's where they said it would be." You can see the amount of my regular payment that goes to escrow but not the value of the escrow account, how and when payments are made from that account for the taxes and insurance.

Who knows what they'll do with my feedback, but thank you for letting me rant!

A few financial things:

- The eye drops - I have (according to the dr.) allergic conjunctivitis. My eyes are so red and scratchy. I wouldn't mind so much, but the other day, the whites turned completely red; every time F looked at me she screamed! And I'm worried that my clients are going to think I'm on drugs or something since my eyes are pretty much always bloodshot. I've tried the over-the-counter option and it didn't do much. So the dr. prescribed drops, and when I went to get them at the pharmacy, they said they couldn't fill the prescription, that the dr. needed to get pre-authorization from my insurance co. to explain why I need the drops. (Don't get me started - I mean if the dr. didn't think I needed them then she wouldn't have prescribed them, right?). Part 2: I called the insurance, and they said they'd give me an ok to get the medicine, but I might not want to since the copay is $268!!! Yikes! I told them I'd asked the dr. to prescribe a generic, and I asked if there were other similar drops. They gave me a list of drops on Tier 1 and I got a new prescriptoin. Turned out to be a $10 copay. My eyes feel better, but you seriously have to be on top of things.

- We got a $27 rebate from our energy company for energy generated by our solar panels that we didn't use. Yes - will go toward the mortgage!

- I have jury duty on Wednesday! Aacckkk! This should not be financial, but it is, since I am self employed and I don't make money unless I work and earn it. It's not only a day (at least) of no work... F has no camp this week, so I tried in vain for a playdate for her. All of her friends are away on trips or in camp themselves. Even friends who are more acquaintances are not available, and it's a lot harder to ask for a favor from them. So F will go to work with D. Not ideal. I hope I get out early because I have a 3 pm appt. I can't change. Ugh.

- We have 547.17 left in the grocery budget, and three more shopping trips. Should be plenty, and we will have money left over to help pay off the money we just spent on our driveway.

Here are a few more photos of Croatia...
PS - I have been working so hard since we returned! But it's the weekend now so I get to relax a little bit!

Our apartment:


The view from the patio in our apt. where we ate dinner most nights:


The waterfront/marina area that leads to the big hotels:


Bar down by the water (a wave splashed up into my lemonade):


One of the beaches:

Despite the fact that the visiting-family portion of our holiday was challenging, the vacation portion was AMAZING. When we visit D's mum, dad, sister, etc. in the UK, we always plan a vacation afterward (not before!) to somewhere in Europe.

This trip was Croatia. Wow! It was like unspoiled Italy with a little Eastern Bloc and a little Pirate. We were in Rovinj on the Istrian peninsula.

Here are some of the financial notes:
- We traveled on Ryanair; unlike many people I don't have a problem with that airline. They charge very little, but you have to comply with the rules or risk extra fees. D, F and I travel carry-on only, one bag each (and no additional personal bag!) that fits Ryanair's requirement. So it's pretty inexpensive to get from the UK to the rest of Europe.
- We rent an apt. for a week (this time was through Homeaway) so we don't have to eat out all the time. We eat simple, inexpensive meals in our apt.
- We did have meals out that were amazing. Best food I've ever had in my life for about $12 each at a restaurant in Motovun, a hilltown near Rovinj. That's a photo of what I had: polenta with truffles and a parmesan crisp.
- We splurge on cool activities. This time we went sea kayaking to the nearby islands. We also went to the Harry Potter studios in the UK (so worth it!).
- Grandma (my MIL in the UK) gave us some money to "have a nice meal" and gave F 40 pounds to buy some souvenirs at Harry Potter. That was nice!
- We don't usually buy any souvenirs, but we were in Venice for two days and painted our own Carnevale masks. So that was our souvenir (besides F's wand from Harry Potter!)
- We brought picnics to the beach
- We only rented a car for three days, and otherwise used public transport (including the boat to Venice)

Here are a few photos:

There is so much to write, but I will spread over several entries because otherwise I'll bore you to tears!

We are back from our holiday. Well - it was really a family visit/holiday. Family visit (to the UK) was first, and I have to say it was not super great. My FIL is not doing well (in fact, D went out a week early to help his dad before F and I arrived). D's sister is... difficult. Her daughter (my niece) is super whiny and poorly behaved (and imagine how horrified I was when she announced that she has nits! D confronted his sister who said that they'd gotten rid of the lice completely).

Oldest son (my nephew) has decided not to go to university (and didn't take any A-levels, so he doesn't even have the option) despite being super smart; my MIL and I freaked out that he is closing off his options. D's sister has a PhD but feels like society is too conventional, and she doesn't want her kids to go to university.

Which leads me to my other nephew who is just turning 15, and is such a cool kid, amazing artist, nice person. D's sister had a falling out with his school that he loved (a Steiner school - so not a conventional place) and school in general, so he is now homeschooled. Except that she travels for work almost constantly and his dad is sort of introverted and a little bit scattered, so he's not homeschooled. He does coursework online.

I told my wonderful MIL that I'd love to have him come live with us, but immigration laws won't allow it. I said even 3 months (max. stay) would be good (he can continue his online courses), and if he liked it I might be able to work out an exchange program with a school here (we even have a Waldorf school which is the same as Steiner).

She said she would pay for his ticket if he wants to come and his parents are ok with it!

D has an interview tomorrow, so I'm not pushing him to call his sister yet to ask about it, but I will after tomorrow! If she says it would be ok (probably a longshot), we'll ask him what he thinks. He's young; it might be scary to be away from home like that. I have no idea what he'll say.

The financial news:
- we saved money by eating, hanging out with family
- we spent money because D's sister made D drive 1.5 hours and back to pick her up from Heathrow airport
- we stayed in a hotel because I can't stay in their house because it's filthy
- we saved money by staying in my MIL's house which is lovely; and she fed us all sorts of nice food. I miss her.
- if my nephew comes, my MIL will buy his ticket
- there will certainly be expenses, but so worth it
- it would be good for him, and for us, and for F, and that is priceless!

Next post will be the vacation portion of the trip!

Photo below is around the corner from D's sister's house... we went on a lot of walks! Rainy, but super pretty in that area of the Cotswalds.

This is the most fun, most hectic time of year!

F doesn't have camp this week, but I still have work, and still lots to do around the house, too. She had a friend over Wednesday which allows me to get a lot of work done, and then she went to the same friend's house on Thursday. Friend's mom and I are super close friends, and we work these playdates out together! The girls are more like cousins, and we really rely on each other! (We also spend Christmas together, and Halloween).

I have to teach my weightlifting class today, and F will come with me. No gym payment yet for May, and it's already mid June. Also, the owner of the gym doesn't help me find subs (all of the other instructors of this class except two of us defected to another gym, so now there are no subs) and he doesn't help me tell people when there isn't a sub, so I've just decided to take everyone's emails and email them the night before to tell them the status of class.

We go on holiday next Saturday (back to the UK to see D's family, and then a week in Croatia). D changed his ticket and he's leaving earlier (this Sunday) because his Dad has had a series of setbacks, and is now living with D's sister. D needs to scope things out, find people to come in a few more times a day. I suggested a chair by the door to the garden so at least he can see outside even if he's not mobile enough to go out there (and the garden is overgrown and the ground uneven). I suggested talking to Age Concern about maybe a van that can pick him up for senior outings. If anyone in the UK knows of other charities or organizations we can contact, please let me know!

The ticket change fee was $400. Yes, $400. But this is important for D. So. We are depleting our vacation savings; next year is definitely "all the fun you can have driving within your own state and camping" Luckily we live in a really great place!

So F and I will be on our own for a week before we leave. We are going to eat everything in the fridge and stuff from the freezer, and hopefully the grocery bill will be super low.

In the meantime, I am prepping for the trip, and getting things organized for our house/pet sitter. I have a big list of pre-vacation to-do items! I'm happy to share it if anyone is interested (and if you have a list, I'd love to see it!).

I also have a cardboard box in the bathroom and one in the closet to toss things into for the trip as I remember them (and go through the list).

Oh - and did I mention that water is coming out of the bottom of my washing machine? Ugh. Calling the repair person now. Ugh ugh ugh.

I am so tired! I took four girls to Meow Wolf (http://www.santafenewmexican.com/pasatiempo/art/museum_shows/forever-home-meow-wolf-opens-house-of-eternal-return/article_4f72acf1-b0be-52d4-ad87-d8c48192ca78.html) today so that they could solve the mystery. It was for F's birthday, and even though I had $250 in the "F's birthday party" account, that cost $55. We made potstickers and edamame for lunch, and a tarte tatin for dessert. F and her friends were super happy, and they did solve the mystery! The "agents" confirmed all of their theories.

By the way, Meow Wolf is worth a visit to Santa Fe!

Anyway, we're having one more birthday party (with the soccer girls) in the park with pizza and I'm taking F and a friend down to the mini-golf/go-cart place, so that will use some of the birthday party money. But I am certain we'll be well below $250.

So that's good because we have a sort of huge unexpected expense. We are going to the UK in 3 weeks, but D's dad isn't well, and D is looking into leaving earlier than F and I. It means changing his ticket (and the change fee is insane plus the difference in cost). I feel like throwing up, but we will find the money somewhere. That is the beauty of having money allocated in different categories. We need to shift some things around, but we can do that. We have some money in our vacation budget, but that was going to be for the future; that may mean that we delay going anywhere else any time soon, but that's ok, too.

Other categories with money that could be shifted:
- $292 in auto fuel which we don't need all of for this month's gas
- money in car savings that we could pay back (we have $13k in there for a new car in the next several years)
- $1800 in airfare - we need to save up for the next trip to the UK, but it just may mean that we go a little later...

I didn't expect to have updates so soon!

Soccer - we got an email last night, and they are keeping my daughter's team together! At the club we are already with! I didn't expect them to be so accommodating to us, but I think that without doing this, they wouldn't have a 2004 team (not enough players). So what will happen is that F and her teammates who were born in 2005 will "play up" on the 2004 team; the coaches all feel very comfortable with this since the girls have already played U12 teams (girls born in 2004 and 2003). They think the girls are at a skill level equal to their 2004 teammates. And the 2005 girls that came to our tryouts will have a team as well; in fact, all of the girls that tried out will be on that team, so more girls get to play. F was so happy!

Sister-in-Law - D and I were discussing this situation this morning and I had a brainstorm: we will still be in the UK, we just can't change hotels and flip our plans around (partly because D's mum is right near Stansted Airport and that's where we fly out from on Friday). We would lose money and also have to drive back and forth across the country an additional time. So I suggested offering to D's sister that she could come to D's mum's to see us (it means her driving there, but just once and back). D checked with their mum (we needed to check because his mum sometimes has a strained relationship with her daughter) and she said that would be fine. I don't know if his sister will go for this option, but at least we've offered it.

And.... I am in the office making money on a weekend while F is at the 5th grade girls party - so I'd better get to work!

Last day of school today!

But there is a lot of other stuff on my mind currently. Lots of little annoyances; nothing that bad.

- I did not get the Senior Center project I applied for. Which would be fine, except the way they scored it was super frustrating. I lost by 2 points, which I'm fine with. But three scorers scored me first and one scored me third. The person who won was scored second by those same three scorers, and the last person put them first. In other words, one person controlled who got the project. Even though the other three all wanted me to do the project, this one person gave me such a low score that I missed it by two points. Frustrating. I think that State Procurement law says that they are supposed to award by rank instead of points, but I'm not sure. I won't protest, but I've called the head of County Procurement just to have a discussion.

- D's sister emailed him to say that she can't meet us on the Monday we come to the UK and wants us to rearrange all of our plans. We have hotels paid for (non-refundable) and tickets to the Harry Potter Studios; we have flights to Croatia and a place to stay there (deposit paid). We are coming 10,000 miles, and we checked with her when we made plans back in December (and double checked!), and she confirmed, before we paid for anything. D was going to email her back to say "Sorry, no." He hasn't done it yet, because he says she's just gone to Cornwall and doesn't have internet. So we won't hear her freakout until Tuesday. We leave in less than a month.

- Select soccer tryouts were last Tuesday night. Due to the Birth Year split our 5th grade team was cut in half (half 2004 players, half 2005). This was sad, but would have been fine if the other girls trying out for each team would have been select soccer players. This is Select Soccer which means you have to be at a certain level since we play competitively in a league in Albuquerque. I talked to a really nice mom, and she told me that her daughter and the other new girls don't know positions, how to pass (and she said none of them pass because each of them just wants to score) or any strategy. They don't know what volleying is; they were kicking with their toes. They had to take out our 2005 girls out of play just to evaluate the others because our girls were passing all around them and none of them could get the ball. Our girls walked away from the tryouts and several of them were crying. I was trying to tell them that these other girls will learn, and they can lead, but the more I thought about it, the more I thought that in any other city, these girls wouldn't make the team. Remember - this is Select Soccer. It's not rec soccer, and we don't give participation trophies.

Then on Wednesday I talked to my friend whose husband is the 2004 coach and whose daughter is a 2004. They don't have enough players in that age group to even field a team; we realized that there just aren't enough players in our smallish city to field a girls' Select team every year. We don't think just having enough girls is acceptable; they need to actually be Select players. She and I just wanted to keep our old team together. Our 2005 girls would be playing up; it's a little worrying since F is the youngest on the team. I want to make sure she isn't penalized for that. But with our coaches, I think it'll be ok.

Well... the coaches agreed, and they went to our Club this afternoon to discuss keeping our old team together, grandfathering them in. I am waiting to hear what the Club decides.

- D applied for a job. I think it'd be great for him, and I know he wants it. I'm so tense about it.

- We are paving the rest of our driveway, and so we haven't parked our cars in the garage for a week. This is also making me tense. We live on a hill, and I've lugged groceries, school lunch box, sets of plans and everything else up the hill. I can't wait until they're done! It does look really, really nice. It's expensive. It adds value to the house. I'm beginning to sound a little crazy!

- I think my friend H (Bad Money Man!) is getting divorced. This is the one who was fired from his job. Poor H!!! I feel so sad for him.

TENSE. That is the key word for today. None of these things are very bad. Everything will be resolved. I am so grateful that these are the things I'm stressing about and not worse situations.

I will check back in with you when some of these things are resolved!

Eating:
M - hamburgers and coleslaw
T - something from the freezer and salad
W - tuna melts and broccoli
T - mexican eggs and crash potatoes
F - penne and red sauce and courgettes

Spending:
- too much on treats for F's birthday at school! It's not her birthday yet, but the summer birthdays all go the last week of school. She wanted ice cream sandwiches, and it's in the budget.

Watching:
Kirsty and Phil's Love it or List It on Channel 4's iplayer. Have you seen it? One of my favorite shows, partly because of the way Kirsty transforms people's homes on a budget. I read that the American version of this show didn't do such a good job and the renovation work was shoddy, but I think Kirsty does a great job.

Waiting:
- for school to get out for the summer! Tomorrow is select soccer tryouts, Thursday evening I meet with the Board of my new client and Friday is a half day.

Wondering:
- what frugal thing we can do on Memorial Day. Most of our friends are going away for the weekend. I guess we could have a barbeque potluck with anyone is left.

Organizing:
- summer and winter clothing. F has grown like crazy! She's 11 and she's up to the middle of my forehead now. There are a lot of clothes to donate to goodwill or maybe sell (several things are probably better to sell on Craigslist or our local facebook buy/sell group). I need to reorganize the soccer clothes, too. Although the season is over, F has two soccer camps this summer, and our team may play La Liga in the summer. I need to figure out a slightly better system. I will share a photo when I'm done! Something where socks are separated from jerseys, and jerseys are separated from shorts.

Thinking about tuition... I found out this week that tuition for 7th grade is almost $2,000 LESS than I thought. Wow. I am speechless and so happy. Even if it goes up a little, we'll still be ok. I revised my spreadsheet and we will be ok into Autumn 2017.

The plan, of course, is to pay off our mortgage by then. That way we can afford school AND put more toward retirement.

I got paid by the gym on Monday, so that was another $80 snowflake toward the mortgage.

And although we're traveling to see D's family this summer, next summer is going to be super frugal in order to pay off that mortgage... I've decided in 2017 we're going to see the wonderful things in our own state (aside from the ones that are close to home where we've already taken F like Bandelier, Tent Rocks, etc). I've been all over the place, but not with F. She's old enough now to appreciate some of the great culture that we have here, and to be ok on long driving trips! We'll bring the tent and all our camping stuff.

Here are a few things on the list:
- Chaco Canyon
- White Sands
- Carlsbad Caverns
- Three Rivers Petroglyphs

It's been at least 10 years since D and I have been to any of those! I can't wait to share those places with F.

I am supposed to go to the grocery store... It's 5 pm on Sunday, and we got back from F's soccer tournament (they came in 2nd - yay!) about an hour ago. But I can't go... it's raining SO hard! Hail, hard, splatty rain. Lightning. Ugh.

I really need to buy food for the week, and I have to work hard all next week, so not sure when I'll have time to go during the week.

I am resigned to not going today, though. I usually shop at two stores, and I'll have to figure out a time to get to each one during the week. Maybe just before or after school pick-up since there's no soccer practice this week?

Boom! More lightning.

We are going to eat out of the pantry for a few days. I am mentally trying to think of what we are lacking that is crucial, and I can't really think of anything big.

The meal plan for this week is:
Tonight - something from the freezer and a salad
Pad Thai - I just need shrimp for this
Pasta Carbonara - need bacon and eggs
Enchiladas - need sauce, more corn tortillas, beans

I can't remember the rest.. but it did just stop raining for a minute - maybe I'll try to go!

I can't believe when this week is over there are only 2 weeks left of school!

Here are the end-of-school things on my mind:
- tomorrow's Advisory group lunch - F signed up to do Potatoes Dauphinoise, which means I have to stop by the store on the way to pick her up. Need to leave in a few minutes.
- Friday field trip - I wasn't going to drive, but no one else volunteered, so the old standby drivers (me and my friend A!) stepped up
- Soccer tournament this weekend - so all day both days at the fields; need to have things on hand to make sandwiches.
- Soccer coach coming to stay with us on Sunday! Need to figure out a frugal but nice menu for the week
- Field Day next Friday at F's school - I promised I'd cut up watermelon right after morning drop off; I am ok with volunteering because it's a free way to give back.
- That evening is my friend's retirement party - he's totally hysterical! And his wife is funny and amazing, too! And our daughters are friends! Can't wait!
- That next Saturday both D and I are volunteering at the soccer complex for their fundraiser. It'll be fun! Later that day is our team's end of the season party.
- F's birthday! We are doing a party with her three best friends - maybe taking them somewhere, but I'm trying to keep it low-key
- Then the following weekend we'll have an informal get-together with her soccer team at the park for her birthday
- We are doing a project at the house to get ready for her birthday present...

Shhh! This is a secret! We are putting up a basketball hoop for F's birthday, and she doesn't know! She loves basketball, and we're always driving to the park. We have to remove the gravel in front of our garage and pave that over, too, to gain that extra hard surface. This is a project that we've been meaning to do for a long time (since we paved over the other part of the driveway and couldn't afford the rest). It's not cheap, but it will drastically improve the house. And we gain a ton of extra flat space to play (on our very sloped lot!). This is the kind of project that won't be as big of a deal when our mortgage is paid off.

I can't wait to play basketball with F in the evenings without driving to the park and finding out the hoops are already being used.

I know all of the tellers at my bank... and they know that I'm the one who pays down principal on the mortgage at least two times a month. They're all really nice... when the mortgage is paid off, I'm going to miss them!

So I brought in another $367.76 to pay down principal.

We owe $34,356.46
The house is worth about $600k, so this feels really good
If we don't pay down any more principal, we will pay off the house in March 2019
F starts high school in September 2017
If we keep paying off principal with just amounts budgeted, we will have it paid off in March 2018
If we pay off a big chunk or keep paying off more each month than we budget (please, please let this be a good year for my business) we will have it paid off in September 2017

I need to get real about selling some stuff that I have no idea why I'm holding onto. It's mostly been inertia and weather. It's too cold right now to drag things out of the garage (I have an old vintage bike that I need to clean and photograph). And I have some (I think) hideous figurines that I'm not sure how to sell. Also some silver jewelry. I should just DO IT!

Oh my gosh, what a mother's day visit... my parents came out from CA for Grand-friends Day at F's school, and it just happened to be Mother's Day, too.

It was sort of a difficult visit. My mom was nervous, and she's still experiencing pain that she did when we went to LA in March, so she wasn't in the best mood. Nervous and cranky. Nervous, cranky and judgmental.

My mom said she had a wonderful time, though. So I'm thankful for that.

They ended up arranging for a different flight and leaving a day early. I'm not taking it personally. They have to attend a memorial service on Monday, and my mom wanted to make sure she could go home and rest a little first. They had a 7:30 flight out, but they left our house at 3 (but this may be because we don't have television; my mom asked what was on, and when D explained that we don't have cable, she gasped and then said that it was ok, she'd play a game on her phone. She didn't want to go on a walk, she didn't want to go anywhere, she didn't want to do anything except watch TV and we don't have TV. D said we had lots of shows on the internet to watch, but she wanted to flip around the channels, and because we don't have TV, we don't have channels).

After my parents left, we went to the park and played basketball (a game F made up that she and I love) because, after all, it's still Mother's Day and I'm a mother, right? I get to do something with my daughter that we love! We went to Whole Foods and got nice olives and some ice cream, and we had cheese and crackers and olives for dinner (my favorite!) with mint chocolate chip for dessert.

I am still processing the visit. I did a bunch of cartoons (did you know I draw silly cartoons?) to try to figure things out. I read somewhere about this woman who draws cartoons about anxiety, and I thought that it is definitely my medium. I am going to confess now that in my cartoon, my mother is a gorilla with curly hair, and I am a sheep and F is an adorable little piglet. She loves pigs. So there you go.

A sample:
F (adorable piglet) asks "Didn't you have dance moves when you were young?"
Curly haired gorillas says "No, I was too poor."

OK, you probably guessed that was actual dialog from a discussion about the dab - a dance move which F was trying to explain to my parents who saw it during a Grand-friends Day performance; it still cracks me up.

And, oh - it was a very frugal Mother's Day! Even at Whole Foods, you can't spend too much on olives and ice cream!