Toilet-Paper-Tracker

I am now going to rant a little bit about my dumb gym, so you can skip this bit if you want.

Rant!! When I got to class (the class I take, not the class I teach) today I had not been paid for May, June or July. Grrr!

Rant again!!! I walked in the door and the owner thought I was the teacher for that class. He said "Here's L!" And then he backpedaled and said "Oh, no - wait - M is teaching today!" Huh? I said "I am?" and he said "Yeah, didn't you get L's text?" Um, no. But I keep all of my music and choreo in the car, so I taught.

Rant Rant Rant!!! While I was doing abs (almost done with the class, but not done) he comes over, distracts me and starts handing me some cash for July he said. I told him (between heel digs) that I hadn't been paid for May or June either. He said I wasn't there in June. I left on vacation June 26th, so what was he talking about? I missed two classes (I teach two a week) and taught 7.

Rant Rant Again!!! He paid me some weird low-ball amount, which I will use to pay down the mortgage.

And more: He said I'm now supposed to teach three classes and one of them is 8:45 am which I told him I can't do until school starts. I hope we ironed that out, but I think we probably didn't.

YOU CAN START READING AGAIN....

1. I am going to quit this gym.
2. I already contacted another gym that has the license for the class I teach, and they have spinning, too, and I'm certified to teach that for life.
3. I need to recertify for the weightlifting class, and it's $290, but this other gym pays $25 per class, so I'll have that paid back in three months or less.

So there you go. Big changes, I guess. And even though I so don't want to recertify, and I think it's stupid (the main reason I need to recertify is that I wasn't teaching in a licensed gym which is because my gym let the license lapse). I've been certified to teach this class since 2002.

I know that ultimately this will mean more money and I'll be happier with a well-run gym.

Now I just need to concentrate on getting architecture work - need a new project for 2017 (made all the money I need to for 2016). This feels like a turning point in getting control back.

So much going on here right now! We're trying to eke out a little more summer before school starts.

Circus Camp - F had her circus camp performance on Friday night. She did trapeze (photo below!) and unicycling and stilt-walking. I bought her a new t-shirt because her old one from camp is too small ($15).

Lots of Unicycling in the Park - We went to the park a lot to practice unicycling. I even tried it, and couldn't even get on the saddle! Grrr!

Soccer in the Park - tonight, meeting friends. And we're bringing the unicycle of course.

My friend's wedding - in mid-October! I'm so excited for her! And F is the flower girl, which means we need to get her a dress and some ballet flats. Yes, my daughter only owns soccer cleats, sneakers, indoor soccer cleats and a pair of outdoor/merrell type sandals. And she has exactly one dress that is a cotton thing she wears after the pool. Where we live dress-wearing doesn't come up that often. All of this means a trip to Albuquerque. They have a Macy's, a Gap, Old Navy. Any other ideas for a dress for a girl that isn't just a dress-wearer?

D's Job - D is getting worried that the non-profit he is working for is shrinking a bit. I think his job is safe, but he's looking around anyway. This is not a big city, and the jobs in his field aren't plentiful, and he's sort of freaking out. So I had to go through this exercise with him where I calc'd only our necessary expenses, and it turns out if we stopped saving and bought only essentials we could live on my salary. Assuming this would only be for a few months, it wouldn't be that bad. So I think he isn't worrying as much. When we pay off our mortgage things will be even less tight.

My nephew - D is on the phone with our brother-in-law right now making arrangements! My fingers are crossed, and I will let you know when things are worked out.

Clean House - Every weekend I clean the house, but I'm DONE so we can go to the pool!

Mortgage - We are officially in the 20k's!!!! $29,296.94. I would say this deserves a celebration, and I'd planned to treat ourselves every time we went went down $10k, but I am so focused on paying this off that I just want to save the money for that and not go out for a big dinner or something.

New lunchbox - Got F a new lunch box yesterday. She'd had her old one 3 years and I was having a hard time getting it to stop smelling! Yuck! I washed it every night! Anyway, it was tax-free day here which meant it was 8% less than usual, and I used my Target card, so another 5% off. So the total was $10. She's very excited about it since it's cute but not girly, a teen/tween lunch box/bag: http://www.target.com/p/thermos-lunch-bag-rainbow/-/A-49146390

And now it's time to go buy groceries and then go to the pool! Hope you're all enjoying the rest of summer!

We made this for dinner tonight:
http://www.thekitchn.com/recipe-spicy-roasted-cauliflower-stir-fry-224291
Spicy Roasted Cauliflower Stirfry (with Rice)

Yum!

The goal is less fish/chicken/turkey and more veggie meals. We eat veggie about 3-4 days a week. I want to eat one fish night, one turkey or chicken night and the rest vegetarian.

Tomorrow night is chili in the crockpot with cornbread. We put turkey in that but it could easily be vegetarian with more beans. Or Quorn.

Our other vegetarian standby recipes:
- tostadas
- grilled cheese with tomato soup
- frito pies
- baked potatoes and a veg
- crustless quiche with various veggies, goat cheese, sundried tomatoes
- frittata with spinach and cheese
- roasted veggies and rice
- tortilla espanola
- stirfry with carrots, snow peas, ginger, broccoli, cilantro and mint over rice
- mexican eggs
- crash potatoes and a veg
- potatoes dauphinoise and a green salad
- bean and cheese enchiladas
- socca
- soup (butternut squash or hungarian mushroom) with bread
- olives, cheese and crackers for dinner
- risotto
- quesadillas with guacamole
- polenta with red sauce and a salad
- pasta with zucchini and goat cheese
- pasta with red sauce
- bad breath pasta (capers, spinach, kalamata olives, balsamic)
- noodles jefferson with courgettes

Notice there are no eggplant recipes on there. Blech. No one in my family seems to like eggplant. And I would eat artichokes for dinner every night, but D doesn't think they're worth the trouble (!!!!). And F isn't fond of mushrooms.

Do you have any other veggie recipes that you use a lot?

This is a different to-do list. I have a day-to-day to-do list and I'm very good on getting things done.

This is my general, overall, life to-do list:
- find a new project for 2017 (I have a lot of projects that are wrapping up/in construction - need a new one!)
- figure out what to do about the gym situation (the gym attendance is so low now that they moved us to the south part of town - we lost most of our old attendees, then the gym owner put us in a room with no AC and no windows, so no doubt we'll lose more). I need to leave and find a new gym.
- 50th birthday party - no idea what I want to do, but I want to invite everyone (this may mean 100 people coming)! So it'll need to be large and inexpensive. Will be in October so outside won't work. I'm not so much into just sitting around. Not sure where to have it, or what to do. My birthday is on Halloween - but the party won't be on Halloween. Costumes? (I'd be into that, but will everyone else?). 80s music? (yes!) Kids should be able to come, too!!!

I am super lucky that I have my own business and can (generally) set my own hours. Which means I can drop off F at school and pick her up, and hang out with her during the summer.

But I still have to do my work which means at least an hour or two every morning in the summer. And I still have meetings that can't be changed.

I dragged F to the office for an hour (where she ate her lunch) and then with me to a meeting at a jobsite today, which meant that she sat in the corner with a hardhat on reading Harry Potter (not sure which book since she's read them through more than once).

Oh, the guilt.

I just want a nice, fun summer with her. A summer where we have no cares and I don't have to make money, and I don't have to take work calls.

She has camp next week, and I'm so sad. I want to take her to the pool every day after camp! I want to get slushies or snow cones!

Waaaaaaaahhhhhhh!

Here is what I wanted to buy today but didn't (and I am very proud of myself):

- Walking downtown, our friends wanted to stop for gelato; we got F a cup with cash, but D and I didn't get any.

- Got an email from UKonserve (the containers we use for lunches) for a buy one get one thermos container. It would be a $20 savings, but also a $20 spend (plus shipping). We already have a thermos for F's lunch, and I have a microwave at work, so I don't really need it.

- Saw a red top on the Banana Republic website; it's a color I love that doesn't come out that often, but it's part linen (not sure what that means for care) and it was $37. No thanks. I have enough t-shirts. I bookmarked it in case it goes on sale, and I'll check in every once in a while unless I forget about it (which is entirely possible). First I'll see if it's dry clean, because in that case - no way!

Paid off some money to mortgage principal yesterday, and I am happy to report that despite the new banking system, it showed up in online banking this morning. We now owe $31,006.56. Which is so frustrating! I mean, that $6.57 shouldn't matter, but I would love to see a number in the 30k's.

It's ok... as soon as F is in camp next week, I am posting some things on craigslist or facebook and I am confident this will be below the 31k's by the end of the month.

In other (boring!) news:
- Jury duty is tomorrow; I am reviewing what I can/can't take with me and what I'm supposed to wear (no tank tops).
- We took the cat to the vet for his annual check up today; $84. I guess it's ok since it's budgeted for

My bank has updated their entire website... and ugh! It's just terrible! Actually it's not just the website and online banking, but also the banking system in the physical bank itself.

There were a bunch of generic, suit-wearing people milling around the bank to see how the transition was going this morning. People here don't really wear suits and none of these people looked like New Mexico natives, so I'm pretty sure they were from out of town, probably representing the system that the bank bought.

This is a small local bank, and everyone here loves it. I don't love it as much as I did yesterday.

I made two deposits, got my receipt and realized that the receipt no longer has the last few digits of the account number on it. So I had to scribble on each which account they belonged to. Ugh.

And I also paid down some mortgage principal. Instead of the normal sheet that shows that it was a principal payment and the amount of the loan before and after the payment, I got a generic receipt that looked like my deposit receipts. There was no account listed. It said "special payment" which they told me meant it was principal payment, sort of. It didn't list the previous amount of the mortgage or the new amount, so I couldn't tell that it was a principal payment. The teller was super-sorry; I kept telling her it wasn't her fault.

I sought out one of the generic suit-guys to ask if he wanted some feedback, and he said yes, definitely. He told me that my principal payment would show up tomorrow in online banking if I wanted to check it (but at the moment it looks like I took money out of checking and it evaporated).

I also let him know that in the new online system, my escrow account (for taxes and insurance) has disappeared. He said that he thought that would be with the mortgage, and I told him that it wasn't; I'd checked that morning. He said "Oh, huh, well that's where they said it would be." You can see the amount of my regular payment that goes to escrow but not the value of the escrow account, how and when payments are made from that account for the taxes and insurance.

Who knows what they'll do with my feedback, but thank you for letting me rant!

A few financial things:

- The eye drops - I have (according to the dr.) allergic conjunctivitis. My eyes are so red and scratchy. I wouldn't mind so much, but the other day, the whites turned completely red; every time F looked at me she screamed! And I'm worried that my clients are going to think I'm on drugs or something since my eyes are pretty much always bloodshot. I've tried the over-the-counter option and it didn't do much. So the dr. prescribed drops, and when I went to get them at the pharmacy, they said they couldn't fill the prescription, that the dr. needed to get pre-authorization from my insurance co. to explain why I need the drops. (Don't get me started - I mean if the dr. didn't think I needed them then she wouldn't have prescribed them, right?). Part 2: I called the insurance, and they said they'd give me an ok to get the medicine, but I might not want to since the copay is $268!!! Yikes! I told them I'd asked the dr. to prescribe a generic, and I asked if there were other similar drops. They gave me a list of drops on Tier 1 and I got a new prescriptoin. Turned out to be a $10 copay. My eyes feel better, but you seriously have to be on top of things.

- We got a $27 rebate from our energy company for energy generated by our solar panels that we didn't use. Yes - will go toward the mortgage!

- I have jury duty on Wednesday! Aacckkk! This should not be financial, but it is, since I am self employed and I don't make money unless I work and earn it. It's not only a day (at least) of no work... F has no camp this week, so I tried in vain for a playdate for her. All of her friends are away on trips or in camp themselves. Even friends who are more acquaintances are not available, and it's a lot harder to ask for a favor from them. So F will go to work with D. Not ideal. I hope I get out early because I have a 3 pm appt. I can't change. Ugh.

- We have 547.17 left in the grocery budget, and three more shopping trips. Should be plenty, and we will have money left over to help pay off the money we just spent on our driveway.

When we got back from our holiday, the refrigerator was empty. There were a few things in the pantry. I did a quick shopping trip to restock and get items for Wednesday through Saturday. Tomorrow is the regular shopping for the coming week.

I am going to try a new recipe that I saw on Eat Well for Less (this is one of our favorite tv shows). http://thehappyfoodie.co.uk/recipes/puy-lentil-bolognese-with-pasta

We don't eat red meat (pork, lamb, beef), but we do eat chicken, turkey and fish. I am trying to cut down, though, and eat more vegetarian meals. It's partly for health and partly for savings. So that recipe replaces the turkey burger we'd use with lentils. Have you tried using lentils in place of mince?

Here is the menu plan for this week:
​
S - baked potatoes, salad
S - fish, rice, broccoli with lemon/garlic/mayo sauce
M - mexican eggs with salsa, sour cream, green onion
T - spagbol with lentils
W - something from the freezer (I think it's chili) with salad
T - roasted vegetables (red onion, courgettes, cauliflower) and rice
F - tuna melts with corn on the cob
S - out with friends (pizza?)

Lunches are:
- goat cheese on chips, carrots, fruit
- turkey sandwich, fruit, tortilla chips
- avocado toast with radishes, fruit
- fried egg, veggies with dip, piece of cheese
- corkscrew hot dog with fries (at the pool!)

I don't really plan lunches, but I like to have a list of things I can make so that we don't have to think about it too much. It also helps when I'm buying groceries.

Here are a few more photos of Croatia...
PS - I have been working so hard since we returned! But it's the weekend now so I get to relax a little bit!

Our apartment:


The view from the patio in our apt. where we ate dinner most nights:


The waterfront/marina area that leads to the big hotels:


Bar down by the water (a wave splashed up into my lemonade):


One of the beaches:

Despite the fact that the visiting-family portion of our holiday was challenging, the vacation portion was AMAZING. When we visit D's mum, dad, sister, etc. in the UK, we always plan a vacation afterward (not before!) to somewhere in Europe.

This trip was Croatia. Wow! It was like unspoiled Italy with a little Eastern Bloc and a little Pirate. We were in Rovinj on the Istrian peninsula.

Here are some of the financial notes:
- We traveled on Ryanair; unlike many people I don't have a problem with that airline. They charge very little, but you have to comply with the rules or risk extra fees. D, F and I travel carry-on only, one bag each (and no additional personal bag!) that fits Ryanair's requirement. So it's pretty inexpensive to get from the UK to the rest of Europe.
- We rent an apt. for a week (this time was through Homeaway) so we don't have to eat out all the time. We eat simple, inexpensive meals in our apt.
- We did have meals out that were amazing. Best food I've ever had in my life for about $12 each at a restaurant in Motovun, a hilltown near Rovinj. That's a photo of what I had: polenta with truffles and a parmesan crisp.
- We splurge on cool activities. This time we went sea kayaking to the nearby islands. We also went to the Harry Potter studios in the UK (so worth it!).
- Grandma (my MIL in the UK) gave us some money to "have a nice meal" and gave F 40 pounds to buy some souvenirs at Harry Potter. That was nice!
- We don't usually buy any souvenirs, but we were in Venice for two days and painted our own Carnevale masks. So that was our souvenir (besides F's wand from Harry Potter!)
- We brought picnics to the beach
- We only rented a car for three days, and otherwise used public transport (including the boat to Venice)

Here are a few photos:

There is so much to write, but I will spread over several entries because otherwise I'll bore you to tears!

We are back from our holiday. Well - it was really a family visit/holiday. Family visit (to the UK) was first, and I have to say it was not super great. My FIL is not doing well (in fact, D went out a week early to help his dad before F and I arrived). D's sister is... difficult. Her daughter (my niece) is super whiny and poorly behaved (and imagine how horrified I was when she announced that she has nits! D confronted his sister who said that they'd gotten rid of the lice completely).

Oldest son (my nephew) has decided not to go to university (and didn't take any A-levels, so he doesn't even have the option) despite being super smart; my MIL and I freaked out that he is closing off his options. D's sister has a PhD but feels like society is too conventional, and she doesn't want her kids to go to university.

Which leads me to my other nephew who is just turning 15, and is such a cool kid, amazing artist, nice person. D's sister had a falling out with his school that he loved (a Steiner school - so not a conventional place) and school in general, so he is now homeschooled. Except that she travels for work almost constantly and his dad is sort of introverted and a little bit scattered, so he's not homeschooled. He does coursework online.

I told my wonderful MIL that I'd love to have him come live with us, but immigration laws won't allow it. I said even 3 months (max. stay) would be good (he can continue his online courses), and if he liked it I might be able to work out an exchange program with a school here (we even have a Waldorf school which is the same as Steiner).

She said she would pay for his ticket if he wants to come and his parents are ok with it!

D has an interview tomorrow, so I'm not pushing him to call his sister yet to ask about it, but I will after tomorrow! If she says it would be ok (probably a longshot), we'll ask him what he thinks. He's young; it might be scary to be away from home like that. I have no idea what he'll say.

The financial news:
- we saved money by eating, hanging out with family
- we spent money because D's sister made D drive 1.5 hours and back to pick her up from Heathrow airport
- we stayed in a hotel because I can't stay in their house because it's filthy
- we saved money by staying in my MIL's house which is lovely; and she fed us all sorts of nice food. I miss her.
- if my nephew comes, my MIL will buy his ticket
- there will certainly be expenses, but so worth it
- it would be good for him, and for us, and for F, and that is priceless!

Next post will be the vacation portion of the trip!

Photo below is around the corner from D's sister's house... we went on a lot of walks! Rainy, but super pretty in that area of the Cotswalds.

This is the most fun, most hectic time of year!

F doesn't have camp this week, but I still have work, and still lots to do around the house, too. She had a friend over Wednesday which allows me to get a lot of work done, and then she went to the same friend's house on Thursday. Friend's mom and I are super close friends, and we work these playdates out together! The girls are more like cousins, and we really rely on each other! (We also spend Christmas together, and Halloween).

I have to teach my weightlifting class today, and F will come with me. No gym payment yet for May, and it's already mid June. Also, the owner of the gym doesn't help me find subs (all of the other instructors of this class except two of us defected to another gym, so now there are no subs) and he doesn't help me tell people when there isn't a sub, so I've just decided to take everyone's emails and email them the night before to tell them the status of class.

We go on holiday next Saturday (back to the UK to see D's family, and then a week in Croatia). D changed his ticket and he's leaving earlier (this Sunday) because his Dad has had a series of setbacks, and is now living with D's sister. D needs to scope things out, find people to come in a few more times a day. I suggested a chair by the door to the garden so at least he can see outside even if he's not mobile enough to go out there (and the garden is overgrown and the ground uneven). I suggested talking to Age Concern about maybe a van that can pick him up for senior outings. If anyone in the UK knows of other charities or organizations we can contact, please let me know!

The ticket change fee was $400. Yes, $400. But this is important for D. So. We are depleting our vacation savings; next year is definitely "all the fun you can have driving within your own state and camping" Luckily we live in a really great place!

So F and I will be on our own for a week before we leave. We are going to eat everything in the fridge and stuff from the freezer, and hopefully the grocery bill will be super low.

In the meantime, I am prepping for the trip, and getting things organized for our house/pet sitter. I have a big list of pre-vacation to-do items! I'm happy to share it if anyone is interested (and if you have a list, I'd love to see it!).

I also have a cardboard box in the bathroom and one in the closet to toss things into for the trip as I remember them (and go through the list).

Oh - and did I mention that water is coming out of the bottom of my washing machine? Ugh. Calling the repair person now. Ugh ugh ugh.

I am so tired! I took four girls to Meow Wolf (http://www.santafenewmexican.com/pasatiempo/art/museum_shows/forever-home-meow-wolf-opens-house-of-eternal-return/article_4f72acf1-b0be-52d4-ad87-d8c48192ca78.html) today so that they could solve the mystery. It was for F's birthday, and even though I had $250 in the "F's birthday party" account, that cost $55. We made potstickers and edamame for lunch, and a tarte tatin for dessert. F and her friends were super happy, and they did solve the mystery! The "agents" confirmed all of their theories.

By the way, Meow Wolf is worth a visit to Santa Fe!

Anyway, we're having one more birthday party (with the soccer girls) in the park with pizza and I'm taking F and a friend down to the mini-golf/go-cart place, so that will use some of the birthday party money. But I am certain we'll be well below $250.

So that's good because we have a sort of huge unexpected expense. We are going to the UK in 3 weeks, but D's dad isn't well, and D is looking into leaving earlier than F and I. It means changing his ticket (and the change fee is insane plus the difference in cost). I feel like throwing up, but we will find the money somewhere. That is the beauty of having money allocated in different categories. We need to shift some things around, but we can do that. We have some money in our vacation budget, but that was going to be for the future; that may mean that we delay going anywhere else any time soon, but that's ok, too.

Other categories with money that could be shifted:
- $292 in auto fuel which we don't need all of for this month's gas
- money in car savings that we could pay back (we have $13k in there for a new car in the next several years)
- $1800 in airfare - we need to save up for the next trip to the UK, but it just may mean that we go a little later...

Strangely, in our family we didn't have anyone who served in the armed forces during war (at least not anyone that I knew). Somehow the timing of war or other circumstances intervened.

But... I still think about people on Memorial Day who lost loved ones or who suffered during war.

Here is my family's story:

- My father was an officer in the Navy between Korea and Vietnam. He still has his hat and his ensign whistle, and great stories about being on the ship.

- My grandfather's brother enlisted in WWI even though he was in Canada and they were neutral. I didn't know him, but my grandfather talked about how he watched his brother's dog while his brother was in Europe. That brother did come home, but died before I was born; since he had no children, I have his medal.

- My grandparents emigrated to the US from Canada, and came down on the train on the West Coast the night they bombed Pearl Harbor. My grandfather had rheumatic fever when he was young, so he couldn't serve in WWII. He worked at the post exchange, and my grandmother wrote down POW messages from Japan and the Phillipines and sent word to the POW's families via penny postcards. I have the postcards and letters the families sent back, and I treasure them; they make me cry every time I read them! Some people hadn't heard that their relatives were alive until my grandmother sent those postcards!

- My father-in-law was a young boy during the Blitz in London. His mother didn't send him to the country where it was safer because she wanted him to stay with her. His stories are pretty scary, but he ended up making it through the war! He's 87 now!

I feel like my family was so lucky, and I am very grateful!

I didn't expect to have updates so soon!

Soccer - we got an email last night, and they are keeping my daughter's team together! At the club we are already with! I didn't expect them to be so accommodating to us, but I think that without doing this, they wouldn't have a 2004 team (not enough players). So what will happen is that F and her teammates who were born in 2005 will "play up" on the 2004 team; the coaches all feel very comfortable with this since the girls have already played U12 teams (girls born in 2004 and 2003). They think the girls are at a skill level equal to their 2004 teammates. And the 2005 girls that came to our tryouts will have a team as well; in fact, all of the girls that tried out will be on that team, so more girls get to play. F was so happy!

Sister-in-Law - D and I were discussing this situation this morning and I had a brainstorm: we will still be in the UK, we just can't change hotels and flip our plans around (partly because D's mum is right near Stansted Airport and that's where we fly out from on Friday). We would lose money and also have to drive back and forth across the country an additional time. So I suggested offering to D's sister that she could come to D's mum's to see us (it means her driving there, but just once and back). D checked with their mum (we needed to check because his mum sometimes has a strained relationship with her daughter) and she said that would be fine. I don't know if his sister will go for this option, but at least we've offered it.

And.... I am in the office making money on a weekend while F is at the 5th grade girls party - so I'd better get to work!

Last day of school today!

But there is a lot of other stuff on my mind currently. Lots of little annoyances; nothing that bad.

- I did not get the Senior Center project I applied for. Which would be fine, except the way they scored it was super frustrating. I lost by 2 points, which I'm fine with. But three scorers scored me first and one scored me third. The person who won was scored second by those same three scorers, and the last person put them first. In other words, one person controlled who got the project. Even though the other three all wanted me to do the project, this one person gave me such a low score that I missed it by two points. Frustrating. I think that State Procurement law says that they are supposed to award by rank instead of points, but I'm not sure. I won't protest, but I've called the head of County Procurement just to have a discussion.

- D's sister emailed him to say that she can't meet us on the Monday we come to the UK and wants us to rearrange all of our plans. We have hotels paid for (non-refundable) and tickets to the Harry Potter Studios; we have flights to Croatia and a place to stay there (deposit paid). We are coming 10,000 miles, and we checked with her when we made plans back in December (and double checked!), and she confirmed, before we paid for anything. D was going to email her back to say "Sorry, no." He hasn't done it yet, because he says she's just gone to Cornwall and doesn't have internet. So we won't hear her freakout until Tuesday. We leave in less than a month.

- Select soccer tryouts were last Tuesday night. Due to the Birth Year split our 5th grade team was cut in half (half 2004 players, half 2005). This was sad, but would have been fine if the other girls trying out for each team would have been select soccer players. This is Select Soccer which means you have to be at a certain level since we play competitively in a league in Albuquerque. I talked to a really nice mom, and she told me that her daughter and the other new girls don't know positions, how to pass (and she said none of them pass because each of them just wants to score) or any strategy. They don't know what volleying is; they were kicking with their toes. They had to take out our 2005 girls out of play just to evaluate the others because our girls were passing all around them and none of them could get the ball. Our girls walked away from the tryouts and several of them were crying. I was trying to tell them that these other girls will learn, and they can lead, but the more I thought about it, the more I thought that in any other city, these girls wouldn't make the team. Remember - this is Select Soccer. It's not rec soccer, and we don't give participation trophies.

Then on Wednesday I talked to my friend whose husband is the 2004 coach and whose daughter is a 2004. They don't have enough players in that age group to even field a team; we realized that there just aren't enough players in our smallish city to field a girls' Select team every year. We don't think just having enough girls is acceptable; they need to actually be Select players. She and I just wanted to keep our old team together. Our 2005 girls would be playing up; it's a little worrying since F is the youngest on the team. I want to make sure she isn't penalized for that. But with our coaches, I think it'll be ok.

Well... the coaches agreed, and they went to our Club this afternoon to discuss keeping our old team together, grandfathering them in. I am waiting to hear what the Club decides.

- D applied for a job. I think it'd be great for him, and I know he wants it. I'm so tense about it.

- We are paving the rest of our driveway, and so we haven't parked our cars in the garage for a week. This is also making me tense. We live on a hill, and I've lugged groceries, school lunch box, sets of plans and everything else up the hill. I can't wait until they're done! It does look really, really nice. It's expensive. It adds value to the house. I'm beginning to sound a little crazy!

- I think my friend H (Bad Money Man!) is getting divorced. This is the one who was fired from his job. Poor H!!! I feel so sad for him.

TENSE. That is the key word for today. None of these things are very bad. Everything will be resolved. I am so grateful that these are the things I'm stressing about and not worse situations.

I will check back in with you when some of these things are resolved!

Eating:
M - hamburgers and coleslaw
T - something from the freezer and salad
W - tuna melts and broccoli
T - mexican eggs and crash potatoes
F - penne and red sauce and courgettes

Spending:
- too much on treats for F's birthday at school! It's not her birthday yet, but the summer birthdays all go the last week of school. She wanted ice cream sandwiches, and it's in the budget.

Watching:
Kirsty and Phil's Love it or List It on Channel 4's iplayer. Have you seen it? One of my favorite shows, partly because of the way Kirsty transforms people's homes on a budget. I read that the American version of this show didn't do such a good job and the renovation work was shoddy, but I think Kirsty does a great job.

Waiting:
- for school to get out for the summer! Tomorrow is select soccer tryouts, Thursday evening I meet with the Board of my new client and Friday is a half day.

Wondering:
- what frugal thing we can do on Memorial Day. Most of our friends are going away for the weekend. I guess we could have a barbeque potluck with anyone is left.

Organizing:
- summer and winter clothing. F has grown like crazy! She's 11 and she's up to the middle of my forehead now. There are a lot of clothes to donate to goodwill or maybe sell (several things are probably better to sell on Craigslist or our local facebook buy/sell group). I need to reorganize the soccer clothes, too. Although the season is over, F has two soccer camps this summer, and our team may play La Liga in the summer. I need to figure out a slightly better system. I will share a photo when I'm done! Something where socks are separated from jerseys, and jerseys are separated from shorts.

Thinking about tuition... I found out this week that tuition for 7th grade is almost $2,000 LESS than I thought. Wow. I am speechless and so happy. Even if it goes up a little, we'll still be ok. I revised my spreadsheet and we will be ok into Autumn 2017.

The plan, of course, is to pay off our mortgage by then. That way we can afford school AND put more toward retirement.

I got paid by the gym on Monday, so that was another $80 snowflake toward the mortgage.

And although we're traveling to see D's family this summer, next summer is going to be super frugal in order to pay off that mortgage... I've decided in 2017 we're going to see the wonderful things in our own state (aside from the ones that are close to home where we've already taken F like Bandelier, Tent Rocks, etc). I've been all over the place, but not with F. She's old enough now to appreciate some of the great culture that we have here, and to be ok on long driving trips! We'll bring the tent and all our camping stuff.

Here are a few things on the list:
- Chaco Canyon
- White Sands
- Carlsbad Caverns
- Three Rivers Petroglyphs

It's been at least 10 years since D and I have been to any of those! I can't wait to share those places with F.

I am supposed to go to the grocery store... It's 5 pm on Sunday, and we got back from F's soccer tournament (they came in 2nd - yay!) about an hour ago. But I can't go... it's raining SO hard! Hail, hard, splatty rain. Lightning. Ugh.

I really need to buy food for the week, and I have to work hard all next week, so not sure when I'll have time to go during the week.

I am resigned to not going today, though. I usually shop at two stores, and I'll have to figure out a time to get to each one during the week. Maybe just before or after school pick-up since there's no soccer practice this week?

Boom! More lightning.

We are going to eat out of the pantry for a few days. I am mentally trying to think of what we are lacking that is crucial, and I can't really think of anything big.

The meal plan for this week is:
Tonight - something from the freezer and a salad
Pad Thai - I just need shrimp for this
Pasta Carbonara - need bacon and eggs
Enchiladas - need sauce, more corn tortillas, beans

I can't remember the rest.. but it did just stop raining for a minute - maybe I'll try to go!

I can't believe when this week is over there are only 2 weeks left of school!

Here are the end-of-school things on my mind:
- tomorrow's Advisory group lunch - F signed up to do Potatoes Dauphinoise, which means I have to stop by the store on the way to pick her up. Need to leave in a few minutes.
- Friday field trip - I wasn't going to drive, but no one else volunteered, so the old standby drivers (me and my friend A!) stepped up
- Soccer tournament this weekend - so all day both days at the fields; need to have things on hand to make sandwiches.
- Soccer coach coming to stay with us on Sunday! Need to figure out a frugal but nice menu for the week
- Field Day next Friday at F's school - I promised I'd cut up watermelon right after morning drop off; I am ok with volunteering because it's a free way to give back.
- That evening is my friend's retirement party - he's totally hysterical! And his wife is funny and amazing, too! And our daughters are friends! Can't wait!
- That next Saturday both D and I are volunteering at the soccer complex for their fundraiser. It'll be fun! Later that day is our team's end of the season party.
- F's birthday! We are doing a party with her three best friends - maybe taking them somewhere, but I'm trying to keep it low-key
- Then the following weekend we'll have an informal get-together with her soccer team at the park for her birthday
- We are doing a project at the house to get ready for her birthday present...

Shhh! This is a secret! We are putting up a basketball hoop for F's birthday, and she doesn't know! She loves basketball, and we're always driving to the park. We have to remove the gravel in front of our garage and pave that over, too, to gain that extra hard surface. This is a project that we've been meaning to do for a long time (since we paved over the other part of the driveway and couldn't afford the rest). It's not cheap, but it will drastically improve the house. And we gain a ton of extra flat space to play (on our very sloped lot!). This is the kind of project that won't be as big of a deal when our mortgage is paid off.

I can't wait to play basketball with F in the evenings without driving to the park and finding out the hoops are already being used.

I know all of the tellers at my bank... and they know that I'm the one who pays down principal on the mortgage at least two times a month. They're all really nice... when the mortgage is paid off, I'm going to miss them!

So I brought in another $367.76 to pay down principal.

We owe $34,356.46
The house is worth about $600k, so this feels really good
If we don't pay down any more principal, we will pay off the house in March 2019
F starts high school in September 2017
If we keep paying off principal with just amounts budgeted, we will have it paid off in March 2018
If we pay off a big chunk or keep paying off more each month than we budget (please, please let this be a good year for my business) we will have it paid off in September 2017

I need to get real about selling some stuff that I have no idea why I'm holding onto. It's mostly been inertia and weather. It's too cold right now to drag things out of the garage (I have an old vintage bike that I need to clean and photograph). And I have some (I think) hideous figurines that I'm not sure how to sell. Also some silver jewelry. I should just DO IT!

Oh my gosh, what a mother's day visit... my parents came out from CA for Grand-friends Day at F's school, and it just happened to be Mother's Day, too.

It was sort of a difficult visit. My mom was nervous, and she's still experiencing pain that she did when we went to LA in March, so she wasn't in the best mood. Nervous and cranky. Nervous, cranky and judgmental.

My mom said she had a wonderful time, though. So I'm thankful for that.

They ended up arranging for a different flight and leaving a day early. I'm not taking it personally. They have to attend a memorial service on Monday, and my mom wanted to make sure she could go home and rest a little first. They had a 7:30 flight out, but they left our house at 3 (but this may be because we don't have television; my mom asked what was on, and when D explained that we don't have cable, she gasped and then said that it was ok, she'd play a game on her phone. She didn't want to go on a walk, she didn't want to go anywhere, she didn't want to do anything except watch TV and we don't have TV. D said we had lots of shows on the internet to watch, but she wanted to flip around the channels, and because we don't have TV, we don't have channels).

After my parents left, we went to the park and played basketball (a game F made up that she and I love) because, after all, it's still Mother's Day and I'm a mother, right? I get to do something with my daughter that we love! We went to Whole Foods and got nice olives and some ice cream, and we had cheese and crackers and olives for dinner (my favorite!) with mint chocolate chip for dessert.

I am still processing the visit. I did a bunch of cartoons (did you know I draw silly cartoons?) to try to figure things out. I read somewhere about this woman who draws cartoons about anxiety, and I thought that it is definitely my medium. I am going to confess now that in my cartoon, my mother is a gorilla with curly hair, and I am a sheep and F is an adorable little piglet. She loves pigs. So there you go.

A sample:
F (adorable piglet) asks "Didn't you have dance moves when you were young?"
Curly haired gorillas says "No, I was too poor."

OK, you probably guessed that was actual dialog from a discussion about the dab - a dance move which F was trying to explain to my parents who saw it during a Grand-friends Day performance; it still cracks me up.

And, oh - it was a very frugal Mother's Day! Even at Whole Foods, you can't spend too much on olives and ice cream!

Just made this:
http://www.popsugar.com/food/Gwyneth-Paltrow-Carbonara-Recipe-41083033

Best new recipe I've made in a long time, and inexpensive (half a packet of turkey bacon = $2, pasta = $1, three eggs = 60c, some parmesan = 40c).

I had tried another pasta carbonara recipe and this was a lot better.

It was good that I made this comfort food tonight. D's dad fell about a month ago in his apartment, was in hospital, and is now in a rehab facility. Social services decided he could go back to his apartment, even though D's family thought he'd be going into residential care. His dad can't walk, and often can't get out of bed. They were looking at all sorts of places near D's sister. But it seems like the residential care places are mostly full of people with dementia, and D's dad is 87 but no dementia at all! He'd be miserable there. D was super upset; it's hard being so far away (we are in the US, but D's family is in the UK). Anyway, social services is going to have someone come out three times a day to help him out of bed, help him bathe, get him back in bed. And he'll get meals. I think D is now ok with the idea.

The only thing I said is that the apartment he's in now isn't suitable. He needs to be on the first floor not second since he has mobility issues, and he needs to be in the same town as D's sister not 2 hours away.

We have a hotel room booked where he lives now and another booked where D's sister lives. So we'll see what happens...

Other news: F is on a school camping trip (the first since her anxiety last fall). She was really excited about the trip, and I am really excited for her! I hope she's having a ton of fun! She spied the graham crackers in the teacher's truck, and she and her friends were excited for s'mores, too! I spent the evening cleaning weird parts of the house that don't get cleaned as often (top of pantry shelves, etc) and spackling things and tightening hinges.

My parents come to visit on Thursday afternoon... do you do those "handyman" things before your family comes to visit?

Just did my checkbook reconciliation for work, and - yikes! - there was a service charge on there!

I have overdraft protection for my business checking and there is about $26,000 in the savings that the overdraft draws from so I was surprised. I could have just let it go; it's just $5, right? But I called my bank, and they explained that the overdraft draws in increments of $100 and I have to keep a minimum of $300 in my account, so I dipped below the minimum amount.

The woman said there was nothing she could do, so I asked if there was someone that could do something because in my mind this isn't really overdraft protection. She connected me to a supervisor, who said she was increasing my increment to $500 to cover the minimum and then some. And she was returning my $5.

The call was only 5 minutes and I was doing work during some of it (while I was on hold). I realize some people don't think $5 is worth it, but I solved a future problem as well, so I'm pretty happy.

This is the final installment featuring my friend H who is having such terrible money troubles.... I am so sad for him, and I can't really help that much.

He came over to my office on Wednesday. I am super busy and I didn't have a lot of time, but we figured out a couple of things.

1. He and his wife keep their finances pretty separate. (I am curious if any of you do this, too?). They even pay car insurance separately (which means, of course, no discount for two cars).

2. They are in the habit of wasting money because it's just easier (he has never gotten different quotes for insurance, for example, so even though he has access to USAA, they have never gotten a quote from them). He "thinks the comcast internet just went up" but he's not sure, and he hasn't called them to ask about promotions. Etc.

3. He pays for major things out of his paycheck (mortgage, etc) and her money (about a third of what they make) is mostly for "stuff." So about a third of their money is her discretionary money for clothes, toys for the kids, etc. He doesn't know at all how this money is spent, and last month she said she ran out of money and he gave her $430 from his account. They do not have a joint account at all. I said they need to have one account where they dump in their money and pay for joint things, and he said they tried that but his wife put the account in her own name, and he doesn't have access, so it was just her money and it didn't work as planned.

4. He had $500 for food last month and said that's about 1/3 of their food spending. So his wife spent about another $1000. That is $1500/month on food for a family of four. It's way more than double what we spend. He said there's a lot of eating out for convenience. Convenience seems to be a theme.

5. He had a new Honda Fit that his parents got him since his other car was so old, and when it was about 2 years old, the Honda dealer called him with a deal on a new Fit, and of course he went for it, so now he has a $300/month car payment for another two years.

6. Their biggest expense seems to be his wife's medical expenses. She doesn't have a major medical issue, but she does do massage and it means that her body is often sore. She has spent (he thinks) about $15,000 to $24,000 on medical expenses last year. I said I didn't think that the max. OOP was that high, and he said she likes alternative treatments and they aren't covered.

We came up with a little to-do list for him, but it will be a drop in the bucket compared to medical expenses and food.

I think he's really frustrated because his wife has most of the control over the money (since what he pays for is pretty much fixed). And he has no idea what she spends, and a lot of it is in cash.

Any ideas about what I can tell him that I haven't already?

It was a busy day...

First - Meeting at my daughter's school to help them get an idea of square footage for the new building they want to build (Art/Science/Performing Arts). I met with the three teachers, and it was fun! Of course I don't get paid at all, but I feel good donating time to the school I love so much!

Then - A little bit of work, and lots of telephone conferences. Fire station, waste transfer station. Engineer calls.

Then - F's teacher called and asked me and two other people to drive the kids on their field trip next week. I said of course. Hope she gives me an easy group! She is only asking three parents to drive, and the rest of the kids will go in the van that they borrow from the high school.

On my way to the next meeting I stopped by the bank to pay down mortgage principal and I saw my good friend H (the one who is having financial issues). I forgot to tell you that he was fired from the job he wanted to quit. Oh my. I talked to him for about an hour on Saturday. Anyway, he's coming over to my office on Wednesday so we can figure his financial situation out. He gave me a big hug. He looked tired.

Then - Meeting at a subdivision I work for (doing design review). There are two houses under construction that are having problems. I'm so glad I don't do houses.

Now - getting a little work done before soccer practice tonight.

The "not frugal" people continue to come into my life...

First an update on H, my not very frugal friend. He still hasn't come over to go over his finances, but we've talked on the phone and I have a little more insight into his financial situation. He and his wife have separate finances. All of the regular bills/mortgage come out of his paycheck. Everything else is from his wife's earnings. Since his wife earns about a third of their income, he has no idea how a third of their money is being spent. He said he wanted to figure out what she's spending money on, and then he'd get back to me.

Next person. We had a soccer coach come stay with us (we host them often). He was super sweet. But it was weird... when he wanted to do a load of laundry, I helped him put in the load of washing. I said "When you're done, you can either hang your laundry here or put it on the line in the yard." I explained it would dry really quickly since NM is so dry. He said "That's ok; I'll just chuck it in the dryer." I said we didn't use the dryer because things dry so fast outside and it uses a lot of energy. He said "That's ok; I'll just chuck it in the dryer." Oh well. I tried.

Next person: my good friend S whose daughter is on F's soccer team. He's awesome, super funny. He manages a Toyota dealership. I was talking with him about when we eventually replace our car, would he be able to look out for a good used Toyota. He said "No, what you want to do is lease a new car." He explained that with depreciation, etc. it'd be cheaper. But we drive our cars a looooooong time. I put away $150/month so that we pay for cars in cash. S says that if you have a lease, and the car is worth less than the purchase price at the end of the lease, you just walk away from it and the dealer eats the depreciation.

OK, time to go to soccer and argue cars with S again!

We went out to dinner on Friday night, and it was expensive because we brought the coach who was staying with us... We have $76 left in our dining out budget, though, and I really don't feel like I need to eat out for the rest of the month.

The groceries for this week came to $97.68 which seems pretty good since prices seem to have gone up.

We are so fully stocked it's a little bit ridiculous. I need to inventory the freezer and pantry. And we have three coca colas. I never drink soda, and neither does the rest of my family, but I was warned that our coach likes coke, so I bought an 8-pack on our last Target run. I think he'll be staying with us again, so I'm going to remove it from the fridge, put it in the pantry and save it until he comes back. [Update on the coke: my husband opened one and had three sips. So I can't put that in the pantry now. Do I need to buy more coke for the coach when he returns?]

The meal plan for this week:
​
S - turkey burgers, fries, peas
M - king ranch casserole - this version http://www.thirtyhandmadedays.com/2014/05/southwest-chicken-bake/
T - very sweet salmon, brown rice, broccoli
W - something from the freezer, salad
T - grilled cheese and tomato soup
F - potatoes dauphinoise with salad
S - we have so much food, I'm sure we can whip something together!

We try to eat meatless at least three nights a week. But it's soccer season, and F needs protein!

Do you have any innovative ways to plan your meals to save money?